Honestly, it feels like a personal attack at this point, and I’ve brought it up repeatedly with my parents. They are clearly on ‘Team Mittens’…
Oh, we’ve seen your kind before. You think you’re the first hotshot mass of crabs to roll through Seaside Hollow?
Grab some Warby Parker glasses, an ascot, and some Vineyard Vine shorts, it’s time to make a scarecrow!
“I remember asking my teacher what all of the blue on the globe was,” he recalls, “and she said that it was water. And to me that sounded like bad news.”
We tried getting romantic in the full size bed. We tried the sitting room on the plastic-covered accent chair. We even tried to do it on the stair lift.
I went through the entire museum, every exhibit, and let me tell you: the vast majority of the oddities on display here are actually quite believable.
Please enjoy this oral history of one of the most important songs in straight-to-VHS entertainment.
“I will no longer be seduced by your meat-filled meals,” I screamed. A droplet of drool escaped my mouth from the chicken pot pie at the end of the table.
If you’re a descendent of Cortés, you definitely are haunted in your slumber by La Malinche, the Nahua woman also known as Doña Marina.