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Tag Food & Travel
Welcome to Bearth!
Jeff Bezos gave me some funding to create a new planet: Bearth! Basically, it’s Earth. But, like, if humans didn’t destroy it.
How To Make Friends And Influence Your Deli Guy
Compliment your deli guy’s non-deli activity, such as his gait, his nimble cashier fingers, and his charming bigotries.
Gateway Dishes For Wanna-Be Breatharians
Breatharianism is minimalism on a plate—all to match your ultrapure white walls, tastefully colorless furniture, and listless dog.
The Second Coming of Christ Shall Take Place in This Applebee’s
Jesus will be among us, digging into a platter of boneless chicken wings and a Diet Coke for only $10.99 plus sales tax! Hallelujah!
A Digital Nomad’s Guide To Living In A Barbie Dreamhouse
I’ve always wanted to live out my Eat, Pray, Love fantasies, working remotely in some paradise Bali or wherever it was they shot Love Island two years ago.
Travel Tips: How To Order Coffee While Apologizing Profusely For American Empire
How to order coffee like a local, while also apologizing for the horrors of the last couple hundred years of American foreign policy.