Lesser Known Knights of the Round Table Group Therapy
Erica: Welcome to “None of this is real.” Today's feature is an excerpt from a group therapy session with the lesser-known Sirs of the Round Table.
Erica (as Counsellor): Uh, you should be feeling free to let your feelings out. And that's why last, last week, uh, when, when you all were here, uh, I talked to you about doing that dream journal. So I'm wondering if, uh, any of you have brought it in this week. What did you cover in the dream journal? I was talking about having nightmares um about, uh, about geography class and how 
Paul (as Sir Luke): Of course, yeah, yeah…
Erica (as Counsellor): And all of a sudden …
Paul (as Sir Luke): You were so terrible at geography…
Erica (as Counsellor): All of a sudden I'm back at school…
Paul (as Sir Luke):  Sorry I shouldn’t say that…
Erica (as Counsellor): I'm back at school and I'm having to do the test in my underwear. And I can't remember a thing. So um…
Paul (as Sir Luke): Ah, classic. Yeah yeah.  
Erica (as Counsellor): Um, did, did any of you have, uh, any good dreams or bad dreams you wanted to share with the group? So we can talk about, uh, maybe, maybe they mean something significant to you.  
Paul (as Sir Tristan): So it’s Tristan again. I had this dream where I was back home in Australia and like, I was just like, walking through the outback, and I'm walking along, you know, just like fucking chilling out, whatever. And then I come across this like, giant, um, this giant kind of, you know, those like things, you get at like car dealerships? Those inflatable tube men, do you know what I mean?
Erica (as Counsellor): Sure. Yeah. 
Paul (as Sir Tristan): I'm walking through the outback and I come across one of these guys. 
Erica (as Counsellor): In the outback?
Paul (as Sir Tristan): Yeah. He's in the outback, but like, he's trying to like get me to like, invest in like his, like vaping vape store, pyramid scheme, or something like that. 
Erica (as Counsellor): I just want to understand, wait, the things that they have, that the air goes through at the car dealership that wave around, that flap around in the air…
Paul (as Sir Tristan): Yeah those things, the inflatable tube men…
Erica (as Counsellor):  You saw one of those in the outback…
Paul (as Sir Tristan): In the outback…
Erica (as Counsellor): And they were trying to get you to invest? 
Paul (as Sir Tristan): To invest in his vape business.
Erica (as Counsellor):  I just wanted to be sure I understood. Go ahead. 
Paul (as Sir Tristan): Yeah it’s a recurring dream that I have, and like, he's trying to like sell me on investing in his vape store. And I told him I don't have the money for that right now, but out of the corner of my eye comes Lancelot. Lancelot’s like driving a hummer and he comes in. And he actually like knocks the inflatable tube man over and tells me to get in and I get in the car. But the car is actually, uh, instead of a seat, it's just like, it's like the interior of it is just like a giant, uh, like a gardening store filled with all these ferns and I get in and I get a giant rash from all the ferns.
Erica (as Counsellor):  Oh no!
Paul (as Sir Tristan): Yeah. I don't really understand what that's about, but that's what happened. I don't know if that's relevant. 
Erica (as Counsellor):  So, I think it's interesting. I'll be honest, for a second I forgot we were talking about dreams even though this was my exercise, so I didn't understand what you meant when you said the guy, the inflatable guy. So the inflatable guy seems to me like, that's probably, uh, maybe just how you're feeling about yourself. Maybe an empty person who has all this potential, but is not actually actualizing who they could be because they're just like roaming around in the air. And I mean, Lancelot, I mean by myself, you could say Lancelot is a lot! 
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Yeah. Um, so this is Sagramore again and I don't usually dream. I usually just fall into a dark, dreamless sleep, uh, for hours and hours before I'm waking up in a cold sweat screaming. But I..
Erica (as Counsellor):  Are you do…How often are you doing this?
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Every night. Every night.
Erica (as Counsellor):  Every night.
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): But, so that’s, I don't usually dream. That's usually what happens, I fall into a dark, dreamless sleep and I wake up screaming. But I did have this dream where I was imprisoned inside of a teacup. And I’d literally been there for 6,000 years and I was growing this long, long beard. And I was wondering when I would get out. And when there would be someone in there to keep me a bit of company and actually, um, Tristan showed up. 
Paul (as Sir Tristan): Really? I showed up. In your dream really? 
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Yeah. You showed up. And it was really lovely and we actually had a really nice chat. And then you started telling me about a dream you had had. And it was about walking through the outback, finding the guy, the inflatable tu... 
Paul (as Sir Tristan): The inflatable tube man, yeah! Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Erica (as Counsellor):  So you had…
Paul (as Sir Tristan): I was telling you about my dream in your dream.
Erica (as Counsellor):  Dream within the dream. Oh wow! So…
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Exactly, yeah. He was telling me about that dream. And it sounds like Luke had had the same dream as well. So yeah. Brilliant. 
Erica (as Counsellor):  How did you fit in the tea cup though, is what I don't understand.
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): I was very, very tiny. 
Erica (as Counsellor: You were very ti… 
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Very, very tiny. 
Erica (as Counsellor: A little tiny, a little tiny guy.
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Minuscule. Absolutely minuscule.
Erica (as Counsellor): Do you think that's, uh, that relates to just how you feel in your own life? Very small? 
Paul (as Sir Sagramore): Well, I am literally six and a half inches tall. 
Erica: That was today in “None of this is real.” We hope you have an authentic tomorrow.